— Zennur KarademirMy sister Havva; the person who truly filled the word “sister” to the brim, the person through whom I truly felt what it means to have a sister…
The dear soul who has been in my life since the ages I first remember; someone I both looked up to and always felt by my side. The person in whose eyes I saw love, humanity, and a reliable trust, knowing she was always there; the person who I knew would love me in every way. My dear one, whom I watched for as she brought books and clothes from Ankara when I was little, whom I watched sewing with my mother, and whom I felt by our side every step of the way as I grew up.
When I gave birth to Ahmet Eren, she was the only person waiting for me at the operating room door. While everyone else was running after the baby, she waited for me to come out of surgery. İrfan said, “It turns out your sister Havva loves you the most,” and we laughed. My dear ones, my brother İsmail and my sister Havva, whom İrfan also loved dearly and with whom we spent more time after moving to Denizli… The number of meals we ate together, the laughs we shared, and the difficulties we overcame are so many. Our Bodrum days, our dill pastries, and then our Marmaris story; you are in all of them, my dear sister. Everywhere you were was full of trust, full of love, and full of energy. If I felt the “evil eye,” you were the first person I would call. My İrfan used to call you “Sarı Hoca” (the Blonde Hodja) and laugh; you would laugh at his words too. When you laughed, your eyes would sparkle with joy.
I am so glad we took our last trip to Portugal; my warmest, most fulfilling, and freshest memories of laughing and having fun are there. I had the chance to spend five full days with you; we had made so many more plans before you left us. İrfan always used to say, “You’ll send us away and travel girl-to-girl.” My brother İsmail and İrfan hurried and left us; we cried together, shared our pain, and became each other’s solace. But when you left too, sister, our wings were clipped. Wherever you are, I need your energy so much; please find a way and send it, I know you can handle it. I love you so much, and I always try to look at life through the windows you looked through.
